Money does. It is the root of all evil. I hate money, or rather the lack there of. I'm tired of struggling every single day. I live modestly. Every single time I think I am doing okay, as in pay all my bills and to be able to buy groceries, WHAM!, something happens to upset my apple cart. It makes me hate my life. It makes me want to give up and walk away from my responsibilities (except my son, I can't give him up). I look at what I can do to cut back. I don't have enough to do that. Days like today really make me wish my Mom was here. I still need her. I keep finding out that I am the only one I can rely on and I kinda suck at that. Between my hours getting cut, no raise in over 5 years, child support being cut back (erroneously I believe - am working on that), sky high gas prices, everything in the sun going up, I just can't win.
Yes, I am whining. Get over it. I am entitled at times. I am going to have to either get a roommate or a part time job. I can't win with either. If I get a roommate, I have no real privacy. If I work a part time job, I won't have the time I like for my son. It will make studying for my classes a lot more difficult as well. Yes, I know there are others that have a lot less than I do, but this is my life. My life is very hard for me right now. I hope my woes are just temporary. Until next time...
I feel for you sweetie. And you can whine any time you like. You are a tough cookie for being able to do as much as you do and still come out breathing. I know that every day is not easy as a single mom and I admire your strength and determination that you have within you to create a better life for you and your son by going back to school. There are definetly better days on your horizon. Keep the faith and stick to it. And if I can ever do anything for you...please dont hestitate to contact me.
ReplyDeleteLove you
Thanks Ian. You are very sweet to me. I have never thought of myself as tough. I think I'm a lazy, selfish, big baby. I'm trying not to think too much about my situation right now. It should sit until next year. I keep trying to tell myself not to cry over spilt milk, but I am a worrier. I will let you know if you can do anything for me. Thanks for thinking of me. Say a few prayers for me please! Love you back!
ReplyDeleteNay, Ian is right. You are a very tough and I also admire all that you do. How you managed to throw going back to school in the mix, and getting a 4.gpa just blows my mind. I know these words don't help your financial situation. I do know you will figure out a way, you always do. I will continue to pray for you, and that one of us will win the lottery soon!! Lol :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks Suz. You are the bestest friend ever. I don't know what I would do without you in my everyday life. Love you sistah!
ReplyDelete"I keep finding out that I am the only one I can rely on and I kinda suck at that."
ReplyDeleteThis statement totally sums it up for me also. Yes, I am married BUT I still find that I feel I can only completely rely on myself. Jeff would probably totally disagree with that and say something to the effect of it's me that makes it that way....he MAY be right BUT....since no longer having mom, that is also how I feel! I was forced to grow up and I wasn't ready.